Tuesday, May 7, 2013

Letting Your Child Go With God: A First Communion Story


I cried at my eldest daughter's First Communion, but promised myself that I wouldn't cry for my middle daughter's. No such luck. Standing behind my sweet Maria as she received communion from the priest, I broke down and barely managed to receive the host myself. As for the wine, forget it.

Much to my delight, my daughter Maria chose to receive Holy Communion in the mouth rather than in the hand. During the First Communion training session, the Director of Religious Education told the children they could receive the host either in their hands or in their mouths. Then the Catholic schoolteacher told the children they had to receive in the hand only. Our poor Maria was confused as to which instruction to follow.

My husband and I receive in the mouth, an action which has deep meaning for us. Christopher West talks about how human beings should receive God's love trustingly, rather than grasping for it; he says that receiving Holy Communion in the mouth reflects the proper receptivity toward Our Lord. My husband and I also have a prayer card of Mother Teresa, in which she says that out of all the things she has seen in this world, what makes her saddest is when people receive communion in the hand rather than in the mouth. We told Maria that no one, not even her teacher, could take away the right to receive Jesus in a more reverent manner.

But I was scared. A kid not used to receiving in the mouth and a Eucharistic Minister not used to distributing the host that way could very well be a recipe for disaster. Maria and I practiced over and over. "Body of Christ," I said, and she opened her mouth with her tongue curling up almost all the way to her nose. "No, no," I giggled. "Put your tongue out, not up! Try again." Again she walked solemnly up to me, and this time stuck her tongue out at a steep downward angle. I had visions of the host rolling all the way to floor. "Out, not down," I said, starting to think we should give up on the whole thing. "Like a shelf!"

On the day of Maria's first Holy Communion, Manny and I walked up the altar steps behind our daughter as she stood in front of the priest to receive. I realized that there was no way I could possibly dive in front of her fast enough to catch the host if it fell. This was up to Maria and the priest. She opened her mouth, the priest carefully placed the host inside, and I started to bawl. She walked up to receive the wine, and let it touch her lips. No funny face, no spitting, no gulping. My little girl, all grown up.

Maria's relationship with God was moving out of my purview. It was becoming more her responsibility. The Holy Spirit had nestled within her soul at the moment of her baptism, and the Bread of Life had entered her body at the moment of her First Communion. God's path for her -- not my path for her -- was ready and waiting. My mind turned to Maria's future confirmation, and then to her wedding or her profession of vows to religious life. God had prepared a path for her, I had led her to it, but it will be up to Maria to walk down that path on her own two feet. Is she ready? Am I ready?

At the end of the day, after the party guests had gone home, and Maria's pretty veil and tiara had been stored away for her younger sisters on their special days, Maria turned to me and smiled. "I can't wait until next Saturday," she said. "Why?" I asked. "Daddy promised to take me to Mass," she answered, beaming. "It will be my Second Holy Communion!"

Oh, yes, I thought. She's ready.

En espaƱol: Como Crecen los Hijos

12 comments:

  1. This is just beautiful! Congratulations on your First Commnunion, Maria!

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  2. I love what you wrote at the end, with Maria saying it will be her 'second holy communion'...how precious! So exciting, congratulations Maria!

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    1. I'll tell her that someone from the blog said congrats (she'll think it's so cool). Thanks, Patty!

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  3. Lovely post, my middle child just received her sacrament of confirmation last week. She told me she wanted a new dress and it had to be to the floor length. She found a dress with spaghetti straps, but she picked out a beautiful bolero sweater to go over it....simply stunning. I couldn't have been more excited for her with her younger sister in the choir singing!

    Congratulations Maria and momma, what a special day it was!

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  4. And congratulations to your daughter on her receiving her sacrament! My eldest will be at that stage soon. ::more sniffing::

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  5. My grandson will be taking his First Holy Communion in July :-)

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    1. How wonderful! That must bring back memories.

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  6. Such an amazing post! I'm not catholic but I will definitely be back to your page. This even made me tear up! You know you're doing a great job when you can make your readers cry lol Great work :)

    ~Jessica Scott
    jessicaslife.blogspot.com

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    1. I'm thrilled you liked it, Jessica. Thank you!

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  7. I am a a Catechetical Administrator. I receive on the tongue, except when serving as an Extraordinary Minister of the Eucharist, because the priest distributes to the minister from the Altar, two steps up from us, and it is difficult for him to place it on our tongue.

    I have always preferred to receive the Eucharist this way. I am a pre-Vatican II child, and then we were taught that it was a sin for anyone other than the priest to touch the Host with one's hands.

    This is not lunch or a snack, but rather a Meal for Life. It bothers me when people approach it too casually. I cried for each of my four children when they received Holy Communion for the first time, and I am a man. Still today, I frequently cry when I distribute Holy Communion. When people approach to receive, I see Christ in many forms. When you look into their eyes, you see Him in sadness and triumph and worry and so many forms. We need to welcome Him with honor. I am glad you have taught your daughter so powerful a lesson.

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    1. What a moving and inspirational testimony! Thank you, Robert.

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