A Vocation of Change

Our Spanish relatives, seeped in Old World Catholicism, are a fount of wise sayings like the following: "God doesn't call us to a vocation of sameness. He calls us to a vocation of change." In other words, God doesn't make his will known in a set of simple instructions and then vanish off the scene. God accompanies us, inviting us to constant conversation and relationship.

"Look at the chosen people of Israel in the Old Testament," our Spanish cousin explained. "God called them from place to place." And indeed, the Old Testament tells a tale of a people on the move. The Book of Exodus describes generations of enslavement in Egypt, and 40 years of wandering in the desert, before reaching the promised land. Hundreds of years later, during the Babylonian Exile, the Jewish people were forced out of Judah and into Babylonia for practically 50 years before being able to return home.

Our cousin saw parallels between the history of God's chosen people and her own life. Like Leonie, St. Therese of Lisieux's sister, she was attracted to more than one religious order but had yet to find her place. She recognized God's will in the interior urge to keep searching and the courage to embrace change.

At this time in my life, I too can hear God calling me to change. This past year has brought both exhilarating highs and devastating lows. In April, Ave Maria Press published The Four Keys to Everlasting Love, which my husband and I wrote together. Then in August, the same publisher released The Catholic Mom's Prayer Companion, featuring daily devotional essays by me and many other writers. Along with a dizzying round of radio and in-person promotional appearances, the year also brought unwelcome reminders that my husband's health is not all it could be.

And so, this past year has shown me that God isn't finished with me yet. What he wants from me is more. To make room for more, I have to pare down and trim away. What this means, for the time being, is the end of this blog. I've enjoyed the journey and hope you have, too.

This blog started on a wing and a prayer in December 2011. I soon joined the teams of excellent bloggers at CatholicMom.com and CatholicLane.com. With the help of veteran news editor John Burger, who supervised me at the National Catholic Register way back when, I got tagged to report on events with Cardinal Dolan at the famous Waldorf Astoria Hotel and on Pope Francis' 2015 visit to both New York City and Philadelphia for online news outlet Aleteia.org.

I owe thanks to many people who assisted me along the way. Lisa Mladinich of AmazingCatechists.com introduced me to the editor of the Catholic Match blog and Catholic Digest magazine, both of which ran my articles. Rick Hinshaw, former editor-in-chief of The Long Island Catholic Magazine, recommended my husband and me as marriage advice columnists for the FAITH Magazine consortium. Mary Kaufmann produced my first webinar for Word of the Vine/Incarnate Institute. Acquisitions editor Lil Copan went prospecting on LinkedIn and asked me to submit my book proposal to Ave Maria Press. Heidi Hess Saxton ushered us through the harrowing days of writing and rewriting the book manuscript, perfecting it for publication. Editor Joan McKamey also sought me out via LinkedIn, resulting in two contracts to write entire issues of Catholic Update. Last but not least, Pam Swartzberg, Chair of the Women's Commission of the Archdiocese of Newark, deserves thanks for introducing us to Jill Cherrey, coordinator of the Archdiocesan God's Plan for a Joy-Filled Marriage program, where we regularly speak.

There are scads of others, too numerous to mention, who helped with the success of this blog. I have thanked you elsewhere over the years, and if I don't thank you here, please know that your name is still in my heart!

I will still be available for paid writing and speaking assignments. Please reach out to me by email at santoskaree at gmail dot com.

Faith on Facebook: 4 Keys to Everlasting Love Online Book Club

Many thanks to Michele Faehnle, co-author of  Divine Mercy for Moms, for helping to run the online book club for The Four Keys to Everlasting Love on Facebook  from Sept. 10 to Dec. 3. We now have 170 members and counting! Read Michele's post below for details on how and why to join. 

This past summer, more than 130 Catholic moms enjoyed spiritual fellowship on Facebook in the online book club for Divine Mercy for Moms. The group was such a terrific success that we decided to extend the fun. So I’m teaming with up with co-admins Amanda Torres and Aida Alaniz to delve into The Four Keys to Everlasting Love: How Your Catholic Marriage Can Bring You Joy for a Lifetime by CatholicMom marriage advice columnists Dr. Manny & Karee Santos. The discussions will begin on September 10 and end on December 3. We would love for you to jump on this opportunity to make your marriage and your faith stronger than ever!

The Four Keys to Everlasting Love is practical, easy to read, and full of personal stories to help you develop a stronger relationship with your spouse. As it says in the book’s description on Amazon: “No marriage -- even a sacramental one -- is free from conflicts about sex, money, child-rearing, in-laws, and work/life balance. Marriage columnist Karee Santos and her husband, Manuel, a psychiatrist who has been counseling couples for more than fifteen years, explore how applying the wisdom of the Catholic faith to marriage can free us to experience deep, lasting, and soul-satisfying love."

Daily Memes

Author Karee Santos will be posting daily memes based on The Four Keys, including super-helpful action steps for your marriage, and moving quotes from the book as well as from Scripture, the Catechism, and Pope John Paul II. Here's one of my favorites!

Share your reactions on the daily Facebook thread, and be inspired to deeper love for your family and a more constant prayer life!

Weekly Discussions

We’ll aim at reading one chapter per week. Every Saturday, the group administrators will moderate discussions based on the chapter of the week. On our start date of September 10 we’ll begin by chatting about the introduction.

The Saturday discussions will be based on the "Conversation Starters" (discussion questions) at the end of each chapter.  We co-admins will prime the conversational pump, telling you our answers and encouraging you to chime in with your own responses. You'll also be able to download free printable worksheets if you'd like to jot your answers down and share them with your hubby or with an in-person book club or prayer group.

The Facebook group is “closed,” which means that members of the group are the only ones who can see the comments you write. So no worries about too-personal musings showing up in the newsfeeds of friends and relatives!

How to Join the Fun

The Facebook group is called (simply enough) 4 Keys Online Book Club. Just click here and submit a request to join the group. Or, you can send me a Facebook friend request here, then message me and I’ll add you. Last but not least, you can email me at michele at faehnle dot com if you have questions or need help. Looking forward to great conversations and closer friendships with you this fall!

by Michele Faehnle

Image courtesy of Ave Maria Press.

Praise for our Marriage Video + Webinar Announcement

A big thanks goes out to Melanie Jean Juneau, the Editor-in-Chief of Catholic Stand, for her wonderful review of our video presentation on "Mercy in Marriage." Melanie writes at CatholicMom:

Karee and her husband,  Dr. Manuel P. Santos M.D., a Catholic psychiatrist, have put together a perfectly balanced talk for the Catholic Conference 4 Moms; it is warm, down-to-earth, yet informative and educational at the same time. In fact, their presentation itself is a practical demonstration of the mutual respect, tolerance, forgiveness, and mercy which is the foundation of a Catholic, sacramental marriage.

To read more, click here.

We'd also like to announce our webinar The Wedding Banquet: Inviting Couples to Experience Divine Love to be held on Tuesday, April 5, from 3:00-:00 p.m. EDT. Although open to everyone, the webinar is intended for people involved in marriage ministry.

To register for the webinar, click here.

Miserere Mei Deus: 4 Video Resources for the Year of Mercy

Ever since Pope Francis announced that a Jubilee Year of Mercy would begin in December 2015, voices in the Church have been following the Pope's call to spread the message of mercy to all people. There are excellent video resources available to inspire and educate us, and many of them are free. Here's a sampling.

1. Ascension Presents An Extraordinary Jubilee of Mercy

This series of four short videos (less than ten minutes each) is available here. Each video features a different popular Catholic speaker. My favorite is this one with Fr. Mike Schmitz, explaining what a jubilee year is and why it's so important.

2. Catholic Conference 4 Moms Faces of Mercy

This online conference features more than 20 prerecorded presentations on the topic of mercy. Each presentation is about 20 minutes long. The conference will begin February 20, but individuals and parishes can register now. This trailer explains more about the conference.

My husband Manuel P. Santos M.D. and I will talk about Mercy in Marriage. Here's a sneak peek at our presentation, where we talk about grudges.

3. The Wild Goose by Fr. Dave Pivonka

The mercy of God flows through the work of the Holy Spirit, and so we're fortunate to have a new series of fourteen videos on the Holy Spirit, whom the Celts analogized to a wild goose because of the Spirit's vast potential to surprise us. The videos last between twenty and thirty minutes and are available online for free. Only seven out of the fourteen have been completed so far. The first video was filmed against the stunning backdrop of Niagara Falls where we can "literally hear the love of God being poured forth into our hearts through the power of the Holy Spirit."

4. Allegri's Miserere Mei Deus

Music inspires me more than anything else, so these recommendations would be incomplete without a music video. I leave you with this astonishingly beautiful performance of Gregorio Allegri's Miserere Mei Deus (transl.: "Have mercy on me, O God") by King's College Choir of Cambridge, England. You can hear the angels start to sing shortly after the one and a half minute mark. Enjoy!

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This Lent, Join Thousands in Learning About Mercy in Marriage

My husband Manny and I are excited to join several stellar speakers for a February 2016 online event called Faces of Mercy, produced by CatholicConference4Moms. Over 4,000 Catholic women registered for last year's event. Manny and I will be speaking on Mercy in Marriage and the power of forgiveness to make your marriage strong, long-lasting, and joyful. Other presentations cover a wide range of topics such as teaching children how to forgive, overcoming evil through showing mercy, lessons on Divine Mercy from St. Faustina, and the role of mercy in combating pornography addiction.

This year's amazing line-up of presenters includes:

• Jennifer Fulwiler, Sirius XM radio show host & author of the best-selling conversion memoir Something Other Than God;

• Simcha Fisher, speaker at the World Meeting of Families and author of The Sinner's Guide to Natural Family Planning;

• Kimberly Hahn, Bible-study author and wife of theology professor Scott Hahn;

• Mike Aquilina, author or editor of more than 40 books and host of several television series on EWTN; and

• amazing friends and colleagues like Elizabeth Reardon, Pat Gohn, Allison Gingras, and Lisa Duffy.

Conference organizer Tami Kiser has brought to life an extraordinary way of entering into the meaning of Christ's mercy during this Year of Mercy, starting on December 8, 2015, that Pope Francis has declared for the Church. Pre-recorded talks from the Faces of Mercy conference will be available to registrants on demand all throughout Lent. Plus, on February 20, 2016, Jennifer Fulwiler will be hosting live in the morning, and moms can gather virtually in the afternoon for live stream praying of the Divine Mercy chaplet.

A special option available this year is for parishes to host the talks as a Lenten retreat. This is a great way to rejuvenate faith and trust in God during the cold winter months before we celebrate Christ's resurrection! The CatholicConference4Moms website has all the information for parish participation here. 

Please consider registering either as an individual or on behalf of your parish, if you're a catechist or religious education director. May Christ shower his mercy and blessings upon you!

Summer Vacation on the Blog!!!

Summer vacation is fast approaching, and things are heating up on the home front. So I won't be posting on the Can We Cana? blog for the next few months, but there will be some great developments elsewhere. Our packed schedule of summer activities includes:

• time on the Jersey Shore
• editing our marriage advice book and polishing it until it shines like the top of the Chrysler building
• being filmed for next year's Catholic Conference 4 Moms
• presenting at a diocesan session of God's Plan for a Joy-Filled Marriage, the marriage prep program developed by Chris West
• attending the Catholic Marketing Network trade show
• continuing to write our Marriage Rx advice column for CatholicMom
• visiting a Carthusian monastery in Vermont
• awaiting the publication of my article on saintly marriages, which will appear in the Catholic Digest special issue on the World Meeting of Families #popeinphilly

So have a great summer, and see you again in the fall!!

How to Turn a Webinar into an Online Retreat

Webinars are an increasingly popular tool for spreading the word about a company or product. But are they the right tool for spreading the Word of God? They certainly can be. The key is to turn a webinar into an online retreat by creating a spiritual atmosphere that reminds people that where two or three are gathered together in Christ's name, he is there in the midst of them.

What's a Webinar?

A webinar, for those who don't already know, is a seminar or workshop offered via the computer. People can attend live, in real-time, or they can watch the recorded session later at their convenience. Presenters need web-conferencing software and a webcam, but participants don't need any specialist equipment -- only a computer and a high-speed Internet connection.

In the simplest type of webinars, participants watch PowerPoint slides on the computer screen and listen to an audio-only version of the speaker's talk. (Watch an example here.)  But webinar technology also offers exciting features to enhance the interactive experience, like live video of the speaker throughout the presentation, and interactive polls and chatboxes for question and answer sessions. (Watch how I used these interactive features here.)

The Good, the Bad, and the Ugly

Webinars, like any teaching tool, have benefits and drawbacks. The main benefits of hosting a webinar rather than a live, in-person event are:

• people can attend from the comfort of their homes or offices
• there are no geographical limitations -- people from other time zones or even countries can attend
• you don't have to reserve or rent a physical space
• you don't need to worry about how many people a room can hold -- a webinar can easily accommodate anywhere from five to one hundred people
• no need to provide refreshments!

Drawbacks of webinars include:

• not everyone is familiar with webinar technology
• people expect anything offered on the Internet to be free, and may be less likely to pay an admission fee or goodwill donation
• people feel more free not to attend at the last minute, since they can watch the recorded session later
• some people prefer the camaraderie of an in-person event
• in-person presentations in a chapel or a church take place in the presence of the Blessed Sacrament, so they have a much more spiritual atmosphere

How to Create a Spiritual Atmosphere

In using a webinar for religious education, we need to keep the focus on Jesus. Otherwise, it can be a distant, clinical, and downright boring experience. So, without further ado, my top three tips for turning a webinar into an online retreat.

1. Start and end with a prayer.

Remind people to invite Jesus into their hearts and stay close to him and his inspirations during this time. Even when we are physically apart from Our Lord in the Blessed Sacrament, we can express our longing for him in a prayer of spiritual communion like the one I used to start my online marriage enrichment retreat:

2.  Illustrate with religious artwork 

Great artists throughout the centuries have turned to the Bible for inspiration. Practically all of Scripture is depicted in painting and sculpture with timeless elegance and nearly universal appeal. Best of all, you can use religious artwork that is more than 100 years old with very little fear of infringing someone's copyright. For one of the illustrations in my online marriage enrichment retreat, I selected this dramatic portrayal of the Return of the Prodigal Son, available from Wikimedia Commons. A notice from Wikimedia explained: "This is a faithful photographic reproduction of a two-dimensional, public domain work of art. ... Its copyright has expired."

3.   Incorporate time for meditation with sacred music

An in-person retreat usually offers time for meditation and personal prayer to consider deeply the topic of the retreat and to ask what action God might be calling us to take. An online retreat can offer the same. After each PowerPoint presentation in my online retreat, participants were invited to take ten or fifteen minutes to think and pray about the questions for discussion and type their answers into chatboxes online. During the meditation period, we piped in Gregorian chant from youtube. You can find many great clips of sacred music on Youtube. Some clips last for an hour or more, so you don't have to worry about splicing more than one clip together.

Go Forth and Evangelize!

So, go ahead and consider incorporating webinars into your ministry, if you haven't already. This amazing technology is a great tool to advance the New Evangelization and spread the Gospel to the four corners of the earth.

Photo Credit for man praying at computer: Anirudh Koul via Compfight cc. This article also appeared at AmazingCatechists.com and at CatholicLane.com.

Sneak Peek at Online Marriage Retreat Footage

The Can We Cana? online marriage retreat just finished, and the producers at Incarnate Institute/Word of the Vine made a 10-minute youtube clip from the first session. Check it out!

The retreat was a great success with almost 40 participants, including married couples, deacons, professors, and pre-Cana professionals. Some people even logged in all the way from Spain! Most participants gave the retreat a 4-star rating, and here's what some of them had to say about it:

• "Very good content!" - Deric and Bonnie

• "You ladies did a fab job." - Shawn

• "I was very impressed ... the use of the technology was creative and very savvy." - Lisa

Thanks to everyone who participated. And remember to replenish your marriage every day. Don't wait until the wine has run dry!

Announcing February Online Marriage Enrichment Retreats!!

 
           Looking for ways

        to make your marriage

                  stronger?

Join me this February 3, 4, 10, or 11 in an online marriage enrichment retreat. Spend an hour or two, just in time for Valentine's Day, to make your marriage stronger! Similar to an interactive webinar, the retreat offers talks illustrated by sacred artwork with a background of Gregorian chant. 

If you've never attended an online retreat before, don't worry -- the technology is easy. All you need is high-speed Internet and speakers for your computer. You can ask and answer questions simply by typing in a chatbox. But if you wish, you can purchase low-cost earbuds with a computer mike and speak directly with me and the other participants. You’ll receive a link by email to enter the online environment and a friendly tech will help you get used to all the features.

You can participate as an individual or a couple, during the early afternoon or in the evening -- whatever works for you. And if you can't join live, you'll have access to the recorded session through a link we'll send you. Watch it just like you'd watch an online video.

We'll have sessions on two different topics, and would love to see you at both. To register for either session, click here. For more info on the great folks producing this retreat, go to Incarnate Institute.

I. Life-giving Unity: Becoming One with Your Spouse and Your Children  

The marital relationship is the bedrock of any family. Reignite your appreciation for your spouse, and let your renewed unity strengthen your relationship with your children as well. Learn how to communicate better, pray more together, and grow closer to God together.

Mid-day Session: Monday, Feb. 3, at 12:30-1:30 pm EST
Evening Session: Tuesday, Feb. 4, at 7:30-8:30 pm EST

II. Holy Stewards: Making the Most of Your Time and Your Money  

We all struggle to find enough time for work, family, and God. We might also sometimes let worries over money and professional advancement affect our marital relationship. Maintaining a good balance is difficult, but not impossible. Explore useful ways to make the most of what you have.

Mid-day Session:  Monday, Feb. 10, at 12:30-1:30 pm EST
Evening Session:  Tuesday, Feb. 11, at 7:30-8:30 pm EST

Cost: $ 10 for one session, $15 for both.