St. Gianna & St. Josemaria: Patron Saints of Work/Life Balance

Everyone needs a few more heavenly intercessors. Sure, our guardian angels watch over us, but why not enlist the aid of the saints as well? "All Christians should adopt their own patron saints," it says on the Catholicism channel of About.com. There are patron saints of churches, countries, professions, and even diseases. Over the next nine months, we'll pick some new Patron Saints For Your Marriage.

Some of these saints are famous, and others are relatively obscure. But each one is a worthy heavenly helper. Since September began with a celebration of Labor Day, let's start with two patron saints of work/life balance: St. Gianna Molla and St. Josemaria Escriva.

St. Gianna Molla: Wife, Mother, Doctor

As a 20th-century woman, St. Gianna lived through experiences that are familiar to all of us today. She was an educated, professional woman who kept a close eye on family finances and worried when her husband went away on business trips. She enjoyed concerts, skiing, and family vacations. She volunteered her time to help the poor.

She also exemplified the principle of prioritizing well: God first, family second, and work last. Despite being a busy working mom, she took the time to attend Mass and pray the rosary every day.

Gianna was thrilled to be a wife and mother, nicknaming her husband Papa d'oro, or father of gold, and calling her children "my dearest treasures." She never considered her time spent with her children as less important than her time spent in the office. She loved mothering and doctoring equally well. Her attitude toward work could be summed up in her much-quoted saying: "One earns paradise with one's daily task."

Gianna's husband, Pietro, remodeled his parents' house into a clinic for her so that she could work closer to where they lived. She kept her hours short, sometimes limiting her working day to two hours. After their third child was born, Pietro suggested that Gianna give up her medical office. She responded with a chiding look, but then promised "when we have one more child, I will stop my medical work and will be a full-time mother, even though that will be difficult for me."

She never got that chance. Gianna encountered a serious complication during her fourth pregnancy due to the growth of an ovarian cyst. The doctors recommended either to abort the baby, perform a complete hysterectomy (during which the baby would also die), or attempt to remove the cyst surgically. Gianna chose option 3, saying, "I want them to save the baby."

After the surgery, Gianna was able to carry her baby to term. Doctors delivered the baby successfully through a C-section, but Gianna developed an infection and died in the hospital shortly afterward.

Gianna's husband and the daughter she died to save were both present when Gianna was canonized by Pope John Paul II at the Vatican in 2004.

St. Josemaria Escriva: Priest, Founder, Lawyer

St. Josemaria was canonized in 2002, also by Pope St. John Paul II (there's a reason why John Paul was dubbed a "saint-maker"). Born in 1902, St. Josemaria died in 1975 after devoting his life to founding the organization Opus Dei, which means "work of God."

Josemaria was ordained a priest in 1925, just a few short months after his father died. The family was soon plunged into financial difficulties. As the oldest son, Josemaria felt responsible for his family's well-being, but his salary as a priest was minimal.

In 1927, Josemaria began studying law in Madrid so that he could earn enough to support his mother and younger siblings. In the meantime, he continued serving as a priest and laying the groundwork for the foundation of Opus Dei, which currently has around 85,000 members worldwide.

A main principle of Opus Dei is the sanctification of ordinary work. Josemaria saw clearly that all work was noble. "It is time for us Christians to shout from the rooftops that work is a gift from God and that it makes no sense to classify men differently, according to ther occupation, as if some jobs were nobler than others." (Christ is passing by, no. 47)

Like St. Gianna, St. Josemaria saw no inherent difference between work inside and outside the home. All work is a form of service to others, of love made manifest, of prayer in action, he believed. In this quirky and evocative word portrait, Josemaria revealed how it's possible to attain holiness even through housework.

You are writing to me in the kitchen, by the stove. It is early afternoon. It is cold. By your side, your younger sister — the last one to discover the divine folly of living her Christian vocation to the full — is peeling potatoes. To all appearances — you think — her work is the same as before. And yet, what a difference there is!

It is true: before she only peeled potatoes, now, she is sanctifying herself peeling potatoes. (Furrow, no. 498)

In other words, intention is everything. Saints from Josemaria to Gianna to the recently canonized Mother Teresa have all expressed the same idea in slightly different wording. As we explain in our book The Four Keys to Everlasting Love, "the value of our work can be measured by the love and care we put into it. Even the smallest, most mundane task can be a kind of offering to God."

St. Gianna and St. Josemaria, pray for us, that we may learn to love our daily work.

Image of St. Gianna: © José Luiz Bernardes Ribeiro, via Wikimedia Commons; image of St. Josemaria: ©  Pablovarela (Own work) [CC BY-SA 4.0], via Wikimedia Commons; other images  courtesy of Pixabay.

Turning into a Happier, Holier Family, or WWHFD? (4 Keys Downloadable Worksheet)

This is the twelfth and final installment in a series of downloadable worksheets to use at home, in small groups, or during break-out sessions with our Catholic marriage advice book, The Four Keys to Everlasting Love. TO DOWNLOAD AND PRINT, CLICK HERE.

Chapter 12

Turning into a Happier, Holier Family:

Jesus, Mary, and Joseph Can Show You How

The Holy Family is the best role model that any family could possibly ask for. Our Blessed Mother Mary is a shining example of grace under pressure, faith in the face of uncertainty, and perseverance through the hardest of life's challenges. St. Joseph is a pre-eminent father figure, protective, strong, and willing to share all with no expectation of return. As individuals we can ask ourselves, "What would Jesus do," or WWJD? As members of a family we can ask ourselves, "What would the Holy Family do," or WWHFD?

Manny and Karee describe the Holy Family in Chapter 12 of The Four Keys: "God was the center of their lives -- not sex, money, or even work. The Holy Family shows us that marriage is more than just the union of two people. Marriage is the union of two people with God through each other."

Chapter 12 sums up each of the four essential characteristics of faithful, free, fruitful, and total married love and shows how Mary and Joseph modeled those characteristics throughout their lives. The example of the Holy Family reveals how:

• to remain faithful in times of joy and sorrow
• to use our freedom wisely to work and serve for others' sake
• to cherish our spouses' precious bodies, and
• to love totally through self-giving parenting and constant prayer

As Manny and Karee say, "God has handed you the keys to everlasting love: how to love faithfully, freely, fruitfully, and totally, both now and forever. Unlock the door and step through."

Conversation Starters

You can use the following conversation starters to get a discussion going between yourselves or in a small group. If it helps, think it over on your own time, take it to prayer, and jot down your answers before talking about them.

1.  Do you see any similarities between your life and the Holy Family's? What are they?

2.  How easy is it to make God the center of your family life? What would make it easier?

3. What pulls you away from God the most?

4.  What unites you most as a couple? As a family? How can you become more united?

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Turning Good Marriages into Glory: Opening Yourself to Grace (4 Keys Downloadable Worksheet)

This is number two in a series of downloadable worksheets to use at home, in small groups, or during break-out sessions with our Catholic marriage advice book, The Four Keys to Everlasting Love. TO DOWNLOAD AND PRINT, CLICK HERE.

Chapter 2

Turning Good Marriages into Pathways to Glory:
It’s a Sacrament; It’s a Vocation; It’s a Road Map to Heaven!

Marriage can be good. With effort, it can be very good. But it takes God to make the union glorious. The graces of the Sacrament of Matrimony are a powerful aid to couples in their everyday struggles and in times of great crisis.

Nowadays, fewer Catholics are choosing to get married in the Church than at any other time in recent history. Many people don’t realize what a wonderful treasure Catholic marriage is! As Manny and Karee explain in Chapter Two of The Four Keys, “couples united in the Sacrament of Matrimony have been blessed with the grace to take natural love to a supernatural level.  … [T]hey are called and empowered to love to the highest degree, the degree that Christ loved us – to forgive seventy times seven times, to do the humblest chore out of love, and to die to self in order to live and love for others.”

In Chapter Two, Manny and Karee describe marriage’s role as one of the seven sacraments, the difference between a valid and invalid marriage, and the importance of the vocation of marriage. They also reveal how the saints, our cheering section in the next life, are willing and eager to help husbands and wives get each other to heaven. From this chapter, you will learn how to:

• Seek help from the sacraments
• Seek help from the saints
• Discern God’s voice
• Be faithful in little things and let God turn them into glory

Conversation Starters

You can use the following conversation starters to get a discussion going among yourselves or in a small group. If it helps, think it over on your own time, take it to prayer, and jot down your answers before talking about them.



1. Why did you choose each other? How did you know you had found the “one”?



2. Why did you decide in favor of (or against) getting married in the Catholic Church?



3. How have you seen the graces of the sacrament at work in your lives and in your relationship?




4. Who do you think has an exceptionally good marriage and why? Do you have a favorite married saint who would be a good role model?





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Extra! Extra! Read All About It!: Press Release for The Four Keys

As next week's launch date for The Four Keys to Everlasting Love grows ever nearer, publicity efforts are ramping up. Ave Maria Press drafted this press release to give folks an idea of what can be found inside our book. If you like what you see, please share widely!

FOR IMMEDIATE RELEASE:

No marriage—even a sacramental one—is free from conflicts about sex, money, child-rearing, in-laws, and work/life balance. In their new book The Four Keys to Everlasting Love, marriage columnist Karee Santos and her husband, Manuel, a psychiatrist who has been counseling couples for more than fifteen years, explore how applying the wisdom of the Catholic faith to marriage can free us to experience deep, lasting, and soul-satisfying love. 

The Santoses draw on real-life stories, scriptural principles, and the timeless wisdom of St. John Paul II to help celebrate the sacrament of Marriage without downplaying the difficulties of married life. In doing so, they will inspire readers to stay in love with each other, Christ, and the wisdom of the Church. 

The Santoses tell their own story as well: how they learned not to cling to personality, culture, or religious differences; how they learned to put family first; how they overcame health crises that exacted a physical, emotional, and spiritual toll; and how they navigated stressful holiday get-togethers with extended family. They let God transform them and make their marriage stronger. 

Each chapter provides discussion questions, action prompts, quotes from the Catechism of the Catholic Church and various popes, and additional online and print resources to stimulate the couple’s conversation, mutual understanding, and positive change. Free worksheets and other supplemental resources are available on the authors’ website, canwecana.blogspot.com.

ABOUT THE AUTHORS 

Karee Santos is a Catholic blogger and speaker and a writer for the Catholic Match Institute. She has written numerous articles on marriage and family for the National Catholic Register, Catholic Digest, Faith & Family magazine, CatholicLane.com, AmazingCatechists.com, and Aleteia.org. She blogs at Can We Cana?  

Manuel Santos, M.D., is a psychiatrist at Mercy Hospital, Rockville Centre, New York. He also reviews annulment cases for the Marriage Tribunal of the Archdiocese of New York. Dr. Santos is a member of the Sexual Abuse Review Board for the Prelature of the Holy Cross and Opus Dei and also is a member of the Catholic Medical Association, CatholicTherapists.com, and the Society of Catholic Social Scientists. 

The Santoses designed and taught a pre-Cana marriage preparation course, and they write a monthly marriage advice column on CatholicMom.com called “Marriage Rx.” They contribute to FAITH magazine’s “Marriage Matters” advice column. The couple lives in Garden City, New York, with their six children.

The Four Keys to Everlasting Love

How Your Catholic Marriage Can

Bring You Joy for a Lifetime

By Karee Santos

and Manuel P. Santos, M.D.

ISBN: 978-1-59471-603-4

256 pages • $15.95

Catholicism/

Marriage and Relationships

Also available as an eBook

Click here to purchase on Amazon

Click here to purchase on B&N

12 Main Topics Married Couples Need to Know

Catholic couples today desperately need a transfusion of spiritual truths combined with solid practical advice. The Vatican identified the most crucial topics that couples need to know in its document Preparation for the Sacrament of Marriage -- and our marriage advice book, The Four Keys to Everlasting Love, covers every single one. Each of the book's twelve chapters focuses on a different essential area of concern including:

• personality differences,
• sacramentality,
• dealing with in-laws,
• work/life balance,
• finances,
• community service,
• sexuality,
• fertility,
• special family circumstances,
• parenting,
• prayer, and
• imitating the Holy Family.

As far as we know, there is no other book or program

that addresses all these essential areas.

Take a deeper look at how we did it in this 

Pre-release Table of Contents Reveal:

 

Part I    CALLED TO BE FAITHFUL AND FORGIVING

Chapter 1    Turning Two into One: How to Overcome the Differences That Divide You

Chapter 2    Turning Good Marriages into Pathways to Glory: It’s a Sacrament; It’s a Vocation; It’s a Road Map to Heaven!

Chapter 3    Turning Union into Communion: Extending Your Love to Your In-Laws and Beyond

Part II    CALLED TO BE FREE

Chapter 4    Turning Meaningless Drudgery into Meaningful Work: How to Prioritize God, Family, and Work

Chapter 5    Turning Ownership into Stewardship: Six Tips for Trouble-Free, God-Centered Finances

Chapter 6    Turning Inaction into Action: Families at the Service of Other Families

Part III    CALLED TO BE FRUITFUL

Chapter 7    Turning Spouses into Life-Giving Lovers: The Creative Power of Sex

Chapter 8    Turning the Fear of Fertility into a Total Gift of Self: Finding a Better Alternative to Artificial Birth Control and IVF

Chapter 9    Turning Challenges into Channels of Grace: Big Families, Special-Needs Kids, Adopting, Fostering, and Stepparenting

Part IV    CALLED TO LOVE TOTALLY AND FOREVER

Chapter 10    Turning Children into Adults: Forming Your Children’s Bodies, Minds, and Souls in Christ

Chapter 11    Turning Our Homes into Places of Prayer: The Eternal Consequences of Everyday Family Life

Chapter 12    Turning into a Happier, Holier Family: Jesus, Mary, and Joseph Can Show You How

 EXCITING BOOK NEWS!!

The books have reached the warehouse, and we have already held the first copies of The Four Keys to Everlasting Love in our hands! Pre-orders and review copies are being shipped out as we speak. Colleagues have told us that they feel "blown away by the gift this will be for couples." We hope you'll feel the same.

To get the book from Amazon, click here. To get the book from Barnes & Noble, click here. And to get a bulk discount on 5 or more copies from the Ave Maria Press website, click here and type in the promo code 4KEYS when ordering.

Marriage Rx: Married to a Catholic in Name Only

What if your husband isn’t interested in being the family’s spiritual leader? My husband Dr. Manny Santos and I discuss ways to attract your husband to the faith while minimizing obstacles (like kids who would rather play than pay attention during Mass).

Question: I am Catholic trying to practice my faith married to a Catholic in name only. We have 3 children together and try to attend Mass weekly but it is very mentally and emotionally draining as it is hard to reach church and the lackluster homilies bring out a scathing critic in my husband who criticizes every statement made while we drive back. Moreover, he is playful with the kids during the holiest moments in Mass and I don't feel he receives communion believing that Jesus is truly present in the Eucharist. ... I cannot attend Mass as frequently as I want to because of our location and other responsibilities and this is a major source of depression in me. ...Our marriage feels like any ordinary marriage founded on equality and peace within the family but there is no Christ at the helm. I really need my husband to be the head of the family as God intends which is something he finds ludicrous. ...I really do not understand the purpose of marriage anymore but I'm hanging in there all the same.


Answer: We're sorry to hear how much you're suffering, but you've described a marriage with a lot of good in it! The fact that you try to attend Mass weekly as a family is a solid basis for a strong spiritual relationship. Lackluster homilies are a big disappointment for everyone, but it sounds like you agree with your husband that your priest's homilies are not the greatest. Some people have a habit of learning through criticizing and identifying flaws in the information that's been presented to them. It sounds like your husband could be one of these people. His willingness to analyze and discuss the homily is an important opportunity for you to teach him what you know about the faith. If the priest was unclear (or even wrong), you can give your husband more information or better information. If you don't know how to answer one of your husband's criticisms, look up the answer in the Catechism or on trustworthy Internet sites. There is a wealth of spiritual resources out there. In the words of St. Josemaria Escrivá, “Study. Study in earnest. If you are to be salt and light, you need knowledge, capability" (The Way, no. 340).

Attending Mass with kids can be stressful for everyone. Kids frequently wiggle around, get distracted, or cry. Playing with kids during Mass might keep them from crying or complaining too loudly, but it's not an ideal strategy. You can try sitting between your husband and the kids, so the main job of explaining the Mass to the kids and enforcing their good behavior falls on you. Then your husband probably won't be tempted to be playful with them at crucial moments.

Your yearning for Mass and the Eucharist is a great gift and will bring you many graces! But Catholics aren't obligated to attend Mass except on Sundays and Holy Days of Obligation, so there's no need to despair. Take advantage of prayers of spiritual communion, like this one attributed to St. Alphonsus Liguori:

My Jesus, I believe that you are in the Blessed Sacrament. I love you above all things, and I long for you in my soul. Since I cannot now receive you sacramentally, come at least spiritually into my heart. As though you have already come, I embrace you and unite myself entirely to you; never permit me to be separated from you. Amen.

Above all, don't forget that God has bound you and your husband together in a sacramental marriage, and Christ is at the helm, whether or not you both realize it. You've described your marriage as based on "equality and peace." Thank God for that -- some people don't have those qualities in their marriage.

Many husbands have difficulty taking spiritual headship. You are not alone. It sounds like you've told him what you want. It's time to be silent and let him ponder the idea at his own pace. You don't have to bring it up again except with God in prayer. Your marriage has a definite purpose -- to get you and your husband closer to God. Your marriage is your path to heaven. Sometimes it's easy, sometimes it's hard, and frequently it's not what you expect. Be patient. Persevere. Show your husband how much you appreciate his other qualities. Pray that God will bless your husband with the gift of faith, and then trust that Christ is at the helm of your marriage and he will guide you both safely home.

Have you struggled with this issue? What strategies have worked best for you?

To contact us, send an email to catholicmarriagerx at gmail dot com. To learn about our marriage advice book, The Four Keys to Everlasting Love, subscribe here and receive a free downloadable gift.

Best Catholic Books I Read in 2015

Here’s my list of best Catholic books I read and reviewed in 2015 — best books for engaged couples, married couples, divorced people, women, kids, and —  well — everyone. Enjoy!

Engaged Couples

Invited: The Ultimate Catholic Wedding Planner: I can't say enough about this great book. A real two-for-one deal, it includes help with the practical aspects of getting married in the Catholic Church plus a crash course in theology. All delivered from a fresh, young perspective that is utterly captivating.

Married Couples

The Journey of Our Love: St. Gianna Molla is hands-down the most relatable saint of the modern era. A working mother, she adored her husband Pietro even as she worried about his safety on long business trips away from home. This collection of the couple's letters and postcards is organized chronologically so you can follow their correspondence as if they were having a conversation right in front of you.

Adoption: Room for One More? What would might lead parents of seven biological children to adopt another child? Find out in this how-to book that guides prospective parents through discernment of the call to adopt.

Divorced People

Eve's Apple: This tell-all goes through so many surprising twists and turns that you'd almost think it was fiction. From meetings with European royalty to dusty ambushes in Somalia, the book chronicles the romantic and professional successes and defeats of a female soldier who found her way back to the Church and true love via her third marriage.

Women

Walk Softly and Carry a Great Bag: On-the-Go Devotions: Written for a woman at any stage in her life, this small devotional is sized to fit into a purse and provide inspiration on-the-go. We may not think we have time for God, but with the help of this book it's surprisingly easy to turn to him for help throughout the day.

Kids

Palace of the Twelve Pillars: Dragons. Princes. Magic. Need I say more? A great read for middle-schoolers and up, this book provides good clean fun within the context of a classic battle between good and evil. The religious symbolism is understated but real. (The title's reference to twelve pillars is actually a nod to the twelve apostles.)

Everyone

Trusting God with St. Thérèse: This spiritual memoir provides excellent advice within the Carmelite tradition. Discussion questions at the end of each chapter encourage us to dig deep and to progress in our interior life.


What was the best Catholic book you read in 2015? Would love to hear from you in the comments.

******

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Loving through Suffering like Mother Teresa

I took the plunge last week and consecrated myself to Our Blessed Mother on her Feast of the Immaculate Conception (December 8). Together with other bloggers from CatholicMom, I prepared by using the book 33 Days to Morning Glory by Fr. Michael E. Gaitley, MIC. Here's my reflection on Day 31, which summarized the Marian approach of Blessed Teresa of Calcutta, better known as Mother Teresa.

Today's Reflection:

Today, we review the three elements of Blessed Mother Teresa's devotion to Our Lady: 1) thirst, 2) heart, and 3) covenant. A good way to sum up what Mother Teresa beautifully expressed is: "Jesus, I yearn to satiate your thirst for souls with all the love and suffering of my heart, through the total gift of myself to your beloved Mother." Our Lady knows better than anyone how much her son thirsts for souls. If we let her, she will inspire us to love Jesus with her own perfect love. If we give her our heart, she will give us her own. If we give her everything and become wholly hers, she will possess, protect, enlighten, guide, and transform us.

Mother Teresa is famous throughout the world for her good works with the poor. But very few people knew, until her death, that she labored cheerfully through an intense spiritual darkness that caused her immense interior suffering. Cheerfulness does not come easily to everyone. Most days, I would rather growl than smile. It is hard for me to serve anyone when I am suffering. I would rather curl up into a ball and cry bitter tears far away from any prying eyes. The strength to serve others the way that Mother Teresa did in the midst of her own suffering is truly strength from God.

We know that Our Lady, Mater Dolorosa, Mother of Sorrows, found the strength to stand -- not collapsed in grief and pain, but upright on her own two feet -- at the foot of the Cross that bore her son, crucified, bloody, and dying. By consecrating ourselves to her, we receive her ability to pray, to love, and to serve despite suffering, sadness, and worry.

To Ponder:

Do I sometimes allow my own sadness to prevent me from serving those whom I love?

Let Us Pray:

Our Lady of Sorrows, give us the same strength that you displayed at the foot of the Cross and that Blessed Mother Teresa displayed throughout her ministry to the poorest of the poor. Teach us to satiate the thirst of Jesus with the total gift of our hearts.

Christ the King: From a Crown of Thorns to a Crown of Life

As the Feast of Christ the King approaches this weekend, it's worth asking ourselves what kind of kingdom Christ promised us. We know his kingdom is not of this world, and his crown is made of thorns. Will our sacrifices and suffering be worth it? What awaits us after death?

The Book of Revelations tells us that the kingdom of heaven will surpass all our expectations (Rv 21:19-21). In beautiful poetic verses, it describes the New Jerusalem that awaits us:

The foundations of the wall of the city are adorned with every jewel;

the first was jasper, the second sapphire, the third agate, the fourth emerald, the fifth onyx, the sixth carnelian, the seventh chrysolite, the eighth beryl, the ninth topaz, the tenth chrysoprase, the eleventh jacinth, the twelfth amethyst.

And the twelve gates are twelve pearls, each of the gates is a single pearl, and the street of the city is pure gold, transparent as glass.

The Bible promises us that in heaven, "Death will be no more; mourning and crying and pain will be no more, for the first things have passed away” (Rv 21:4).

Worshiping Christ the King reminds us that we have a share in his kingdom. We are the sons and daughters of God, a people set apart, a royal priesthood (1 Peter 2:9). He has already crowned us, weak and frail though we are, with the glory and honor of his divinity (Ps 8:4-5).

Whether we know it or not, the kingdom of God is already among us (Lk 17:21). Each time we pray to him with love, each time we seek to do his will, each time we accept trials with calm hearts, we are living up to our royal vocation. Each time we stand up for what's right, proclaim the truth, and hug the hurting, we are building the kingdom.

We have been given an honorable birthright and a glorious crown. At times, we must wear a humiliating and painful crown of thorns. But we look forward with hope in God's promise: "Be faithful until death, and I will give you the crown of life" (Rv 2:10).

Image by Ralph Hammann (Own work) [GFDL (http://www.gnu.org/copyleft/fdl.html) or CC BY-SA 3.0 (http://creativecommons.org/licenses/by-sa/3.0)], via Wikimedia Commons

Saintly Marriages: The Good, the Bad, and the Holy

Since November begins with All Saints Day, it's a great month to reflect on the intellectual and spiritual richness that saints bring to the Catholic faith. As an Episcopalian-turned-Catholic, I find the saints to be one of the most inspiring gifts of Catholicism. It's like having instant access to hundreds of excellent role models who want to be your best friends here and in heaven -- the original BFFs.

Earlier this year, I wrote an article on some of my favorite married saints for the Catholic Digest special issue on the World Meeting of Families that took place in Philadelphia. Several readers have asked for the text, and it's finally available online! You can read the beginning here, and click through to the Catholic Digest site to read the rest.

The saints are our cheering section in heaven, rooting for us to finish the race and win the victor’s crown. They can show us how to be better people, better Catholics, and better husbands and wives. Although many saints come from the ranks of the priesthood and the religious life, there are more than 100 married saints and blesseds who show us how to live up to the beautiful but difficult vocation of marriage and parenthood.

Some saints had great marriages, and other saints had dreadful ones. But in every one of their life stories, these men and women reached sainthood through the grace-filled choices they made as spouses and parents.

Read more here. 

Image By Selbymay (Own work) [CC BY-SA 3.0 (http://creativecommons.org/licenses/by-sa/3.0)], via Wikimedia Commons

Staying Faithful Despite Divorce (Guest Post)

Today, we welcome Linda George, a Catholic home-schooling mom of seven, whose husband divorced her after 17 years of marriage. Linda has made the choice to stay faithful to her marriage vows despite the civil divorce and regardless of the possibility of reconciliation with her husband. Here, she explains why and how she lives as she does.

Sometimes life takes an unexpected turn in a direction that was totally unforeseen to those involved.  Such was the case for my children and me back in June of 2007.  It was a year of surprises, but not the type of surprises that are received with joy and contentment.  No this was more of a thunderbolt that leaves a permanent mark on you and your family forever.  It is the evil consequences and results surrounding the end of a marriage.

Of course, if I could have repaired and restored our lives to what they had been prior to this dark time, I would have done almost anything within my human ability.  After all the role of a mother is to protect her children from the dangers that exist within our world. From a Catholic perspective we are to teach our children how to be Godly, caring, and Christ-like members of society, living virtuous lives.  Our hope as Catholic parents is to raise the next generation of saints and to teach our children to live as Christ did. The family is the most basic fundamental part of society and a broken family has a different impact on society.

After our lives were catapulted into uncharted territory nothing was the same anymore.  No event in the lives of my children would be comparable to the way things used to be.  We would never be able to do things as we had done before.  How could they be the same if there was a parent missing from their daily life?  There was no longer a father in our home.  As a result there would be none of our typical family dinners, or holidays, or vacations with their dad by my side.  We would no longer attend Mass as a family.  The milestones in the lives of my children were now marked with a permanent change.

At one point there was absolute uncertainty in every area of our lives.  Suddenly there was no longer a predictable direction for our family, the plans my husband and I had laid out together for our family had been shifted. There were so many unknowns. Thankfully, however there was one aspect of my life that I did have control over and that was my marital covenant.  I had a “safety net” so to speak because of our Catholic teaching on the indissolubility of marriage.  Although courts were deciding our fate in so many areas of our lives this was something that I could decide.  It was attainable by simply making a decision to continue to live as a married person after my civil marriage ended.  It was what the church had defined for us under the sacrament of marriage and this teaching became my safety net.

I was and am so grateful to God for giving my children and me a safe refuge to begin to restore the brokenness within our lives.  Living in a married state after a civil divorce and allowing Jesus to work on fixing me from the inside was the beginning of a healing process.  I am deeply moved by what God has done for us as a family and how He has made much good come from so much suffering and pain. Thank you, Lord, for loving me as your spouse and for caring for my children as a parent does.

Sacramentally Yours

On Sunday May 17th, 2015, while I was praying at the end of the Divine Liturgy, the words “Sacramentally Yours” came to me.  It is my belief that these words were divinely inspired and were to be used in connection with a religious order within our Catholic Church -- a third order community founded for those in our faith who have kept their marital covenant after a civil divorce.

As Catholics, our teachings on marriage are so beautiful and lasting. Unfortunately, due to circumstances outside of our control many of us find ourselves in a situation we never imagined possible.  Families in the world are under attack and divorce is a destruction that is shaking the foundation and stability of families from the inside.  However, having hope in the midst of the darkness and ugliness of divorce for any that remain “sacramentally married” to Christ, the third person in the sacrament, we are given the graces and strength needed to endure the suffering and turmoil surrounding divorce.  By embracing the church teaching, we have been given a framework that supports our values and morals.  For those of us in these situations, creating an order where we can live a chaste and consecrated religious life would be a blessing in so many ways.  The mission of this order would be to pray for the families in crisis and to restore hope and love to the hearts of all of the families who are suffering through the painful results of divorce. The broken praying for the broken and giving each other hope.

Although the scars from divorce can last a lifetime, God in his mercy has restored my children and our family.  God became the father of our children and our family became whole again.  I believe that the blessing that Christ gave to our family was a result of continuing to live within my marriage vows.  I am deeply grateful that under the umbrella of our church I found a serenity and peace that was beyond my human understanding.  Through many hours of prayer, I began to understand and learn that Christ could fill the voids that existed in the spiritual dimension of a broken marriage.  As I mourned the death of my marriage, I began to feel in a very real way the glory of God.  It is my hope that by spreading a renewed awareness of an existing doctrine, we can share the healing and peace that our family found with many others.

My circumstances may not be much different from those of many who find themselves in a situation that was completely unexpected.  My husband and I were married for 17 years and had seven children together. We were a Catholic homeschooling family who was heavily involved in our church and community. As you can imagine, his desire to end the marriage and leave our family was not something for which I had prepared.  My children and I were faced with immeasurable uncertainty and grief.

Although it was painful for me as a spouse, my own suffering was outweighed by care for my children.  How could I make their lives better?  What could I do at this moment to decrease their suffering and, most of all, how could I continue to teach that marriage is for life? I wanted to bring peace into my home in the midst of my children's heartache. Thankfully, our Catholic doctrine on Sacramental marriage gave my children and myself a safe refuge and peace.  The kids began asking so many questions about marriage and divorce, since my older children had been taught about their sacraments.  They knew that marriage in the eyes of God and in our church was for life. I had no idea at the time how blessed and how many graces the kids and I would receive from this choice back then. Since then, I have been able to teach the children more about living out my marital commitment in the absence of a spouse. Christ is still in the center of the sacrament and can still bless us. We know as Catholics that the sacrament of marriage is so sacred that a civil court does not dissolve this union with Christ.  This union is still in existence for us to prayerfully embrace.

Pope-Watching: Best Posts from Francis' Visit to the U.S. & Cuba

The secular and Catholic media have been filled with reports on Pope Francis' first visit to the U.S. this past week. Here's a round-up of the best papal news.

Background

Is the Pope Catholic?: This Newsweek article deserves a prize for the name alone. In-depth look into the Pope's words and the media's spin on them.

Pope Francis arrives in the US; denies being a leftist: This article by John L. Allen Jr., a reporter respected by Catholics of all stripes, gives the Pope's response to allegations that's he's more leftist than Catholic.

Visit to Cuba

Pope Francis Goes Off-Script to Deliver Passionate Homily on Poverty: In typical Francis style, the pope speaks extemporaneously about a topic dear to his heart.

Francis Hit with Tranquilizer Dart by Swiss Guard Seconds After Speaking Off-Cuff: This hilarious satire piece by the Eye of the Tiber, the Catholic equivalent of The Onion, expresses the frustration of some Catholics -- especially Catholic bloggers and journalists -- with Pope Francis' unpredictable statements.

Visit to Washington, D.C.

Hero or Horror? Junipero Serra becomes a saint: Interesting article by CNN about the surprisingly controversial decision to canonize the founder of several Spanish missions in California during Pope Francis' visit to Washington, D.C. yesterday. Pope Francis views Fr. Serra as one of the founding fathers of the United States and a special patron of the Hispanic people of the country.

Love for Pope Brings Them to the Streets, Not Necessarily to Church: Interviews of people crowded around the Pope's parade route through D.C. show that many welcome him as a celebrity, but not as the Vicar of Christ.

White House Welcoming Ceremony for Pope Francis: Watch the whole one-hour ceremony on C-SPAN here. Or fast forward to the Pope's talk, which lasts about ten minutes.

Pope Francis Challenges Congress: This morning, Pope Francis became the first pope ever to address a joint meeting of Congress. He spoke on issues relating to immigration, capitalism, the environment, religious liberty, and the traditional family.

Upcoming Visit to New York

Papal Itinerary: This post lists all the Pope's upcoming activities in the United States, including a speech to the United Nations, an ecumenical prayer service at Ground Zero, a visit to Harlem, and Friday evening's Mass at Madison Square Garden (yours truly will be reporting on the Mass for news site Aleteia.org!).

Live Stream: For those who are not in the crowds surrounding Pope Francis, but would really like to be, live streaming coverage is available at this web site. You'll feel like you're actually there.

Journey of Love: Married Life of St. Gianna, Patron of the World Meeting of Families

As Philadelphia gears up for the influx of an expected three million people for the World Meeting of Families starting on September 21, we can all take a moment to pray to one of the meeting's patron saints, St. Gianna Molla. (The other patron saint, also dear to my heart, is Pope John Paul II.)

St. Gianna is easier to relate to than many earlier female saints who were virgins, queens, or martyrs. She was a doctor, a working mother, who was married to an engineer. Born in 1922, she experienced many of the amenities of modern life, like telephones, trains, planes and automobiles. Her letters to her husband were gathered and published in a beautiful volume back in 2002. But her letters tell only half the story. After her husband Pietro's death in 2010, his letters were published alongside hers in a book entitled The Journey of Our Love (Pauline, 2004).

The book offers us an intimate look into the private romantic life of a married saint. Rarely do we come to know another's marriage well. Behind the smiles are often tears, and behind closed lips are often unshared sorrows. The letters between Gianna and Pietro reveal their life, unfiltered, and it's an inspiration to behold.

A successful factory manager, ten years older than Gianna, Pietro had the heart of a poet. His letters to his fiancee during the time of their engagement were filled with metaphorical kisses: "a kiss as deep and sweet as the sea" and "another kiss, a long kiss, with a wish for a peaceful night like the night on these quivering waters kissed by the moon."

Pietro was dedicated to helping Gianna achieve success in her chosen medical profession. He even had the house of his parents remodeled into a clinic for her. For her part, Gianna patiently withstood Pietro's long hours and frequent business trips, although she was terrified for him whenever he traveled by plane. Sometimes, he took trains to allay her fears, even though the overland trip would last much longer. He couldn't always avoid planes, however, especially when he visited the United States. So he penned a prayer, which he shared with his wife in one of his letters:

Jesus, who created me and preserve me with graces and blessings without number: you who among the long flights of time and of today, up here in the Heavens, have given me the immense gift of a wife of gold, ...

Bless Gianna and our treasures [their children]! Change into grace their anxiety and worry over my long absence and my flights. ...

Grant that a serene and luminous atmosphere may always enfold our family, like the atmosphere in the sky through which I am flying and the purity of the clear air I am breathing. ...

Keep my family and my dear ones safe, happy, and peaceful in the way of your light, today and always until the day we will fly up, up, always higher, up to you. Amen.

In this prayer, Pietro naturally wove the smallest details of his daily life into a hymn to the divine. Gianna's sweetness and caring appears consistently in her letters, and Pietro shows himself to be a man worthy of his wife.

St. Gianna is regarded as a pro-life hero, since she died after a difficult pregnancy and childbirth in which she directed the doctors to save her unborn child first and then herself. Not everyone will be faced with such a drastic dilemma. But we can all follow the path of passion and compassion displayed in these beautiful love letters between husband and wife.

My thanks to Pauline Books for providing a free review copy.

What Would You Give for 90 Minutes in Heaven?

Two-thirds of Americans believe in heaven. Several million people claim that they have gone through near-death experiences, as many as 15% of the population of some countries. But does anyone really know what happens when we die and what heaven is really like? Most importantly, will we ever get there? A burning desire to know explains the popularity of stories like the recent movie 90 Minutes in Heaven, based on a book that sold over 5 million copies and was translated into 40 languages.

The movie grippingly depicts the path to healing of a Protestant pastor who was declared medically dead for 90 minutes and then came back to life after a passerby prayed over him. Based on a true story, the book was only published after years of soul-searching when the author Don Piper realized that the purpose of his near-death experience was for him to share it with others.

After experiencing heaven for 90 minutes, Piper had very little will to return to life on this earth. Lying in a hospital bed for months, he asked over and over why God couldn't have just let him die. The movie gave me uncomfortable flashbacks of my husband in a hospital bed recovering from his multiple brain surgeries -- only I was the one in danger of despair, not my husband. Actor Hayden Christensen (of the recent Star Wars trilogy) is believable in his utter despondency. Watching Hayden Christensen in Star Wars, I thought that the tragic role of Darth Vader was beyond his talent. But Christensen has grown as an actor, and the tragic role of Don Piper is not writ quite so large.

The surprising character of the film was Piper's wife Eva, played by Kate Bosworth (of Superman Returns). On the first day in the hospital, she couldn't even provide financial or insurance information -- her husband had taken care of everything and left her in a state of dependence. She reminded me of my Southern grandmother (also married to a Protestant minister), who neither learned to drive nor balance a checkbook. Only when my grandfather developed Alzheimer's did my grandmother have to take the reins. Similarly, in the Piper family, Don's car accident forced Eva to become the leader of the family temporarily, to the extent that she even overrode his decisions since he was in no emotional shape to make rational choices.

Kate Bosworth makes Eva's strength and determination shine through, although her stoicism at times translates into a lack of expression. It was also jarring to see a blond fashion plate (and celebrity fashion designer) like Bosworth dressed in one of the drabbest wardrobes I've ever seen. The calf-length skirts were refreshingly modest and could have been beautiful if they weren't in unrelieved shades of brown. It's as if the costume designer thought that religious Christians were opposed to beauty.

At the end of the movie, the audience gets to see a cinematic representation of Piper's vision of heaven. Obviously, nothing on the big screen can come close to capturing reality. As the hymn based on St. Paul's Letter to the Corinthians says, "eye has not seen, ear has not heard, what God has ready for those who love him." Whatever heaven is like, Hollywood can't recreate it. On an artistic level, I preferred the representation of heaven in What Dreams May Come, a 1998 movie with Robin Williams. But theologically speaking, 90 Minutes in Heaven makes the important point that none of us gets to heaven alone. Close friends, distant acquaintances, family members and even strangers play important roles in our salvation. We impact each other in ways that we will never know until we approach the pearly gates. The movie presents a compelling counter-argument to Sartre's wry dig that "hell is other people." It reminds us that heaven holds the communion of saints.

My thanks to Carmel Communications for providing a no-cost advance screening of the film.

Your Marriage is a Pearl of Great Price

I never understood the parable of the pearl of great price until just recently. Why would a merchant sell all that he had in order to buy a single pearl, no matter how valuable? It contradicts the cardinal rule of investing: diversify your holdings. It conflicts with the commonsense rule of life: don't put all your eggs in one basket. It doesn't make rational sense.

Then one day, my whole perspective changed as a result of a casual encounter on the beach. I was introduced to Marian, an extended family member. As Marian and I stood on the sand exchanging pleasantries, a ray of sunlight glinted off the necklace I was wearing. "Oh," exclaimed Marian, "a pearl!" I explained that my husband had given me the pendant as an anniversary present, celebrating many years and many children together. Grinning, she remarked, "Your marriage is a pearl of great price."

Her words made the incomprehensible parable comprehensible. When I married my husband and promised to forsake all others, I gave away all that I was and all that I had. When I vowed to stay true for richer, for poorer, in sickness and in health, I (metaphorically) placed my eggs in one basket. I risked everything, and I made the right choice -- an irreversible one.

Marriage has no back-up plan, no escape hatch, no termination clause. Marriage is permanent, and the commitment to love our spouse is everlasting. We risk everything in the hopes of gaining everything. We sell everything in order to buy a pearl of great price.

This element of risk may make marriage vows seem rash. But every vow, every promise of future behavior, is dangerously uncertain. As G.K. Chesterton wrote:

The man who makes a vow makes an appointment with himself at some distant time or place. The danger of it is that himself should not keep the appointment. And in modern times this terror of one's self, of the weakness and mutability of one's self, has perilously increased and is the real basis of the objection to vows of any kind. ... It is exactly this backdoor, this sense of having a retreat behind us, that is, to our minds, the sterilizing spirit of modern pleasure.

What makes a vow sane, according to Chesterton, is the "transfiguring self-discipline" that leads a man to promise great things and never give up fighting to achieve them. But a vow is not only risky because of our own weakness and mutability. It's also risky in light of any weakness in the other person. Can we trust our partner to keep his or her own vow? What if the "pearl" turns out to be flawed or, worse yet, counterfeit?

Let's return to the parable. In Jesus' allegorical story, the pearl of great price represents the kingdom of heaven. As people of faith, we can be certain that heaven is never counterfeit and that God's perfect love is real and eternal. On a human level, marriage does not have the same degree of certainty. All human beings have flaws, some big and some small. One of those flaws is the tendency to overemphasize other's imperfections while minimizing our own. We suspect, when sorrow comes, that we've somehow been cheated out of our just due.

But sacramental marriage is more than a merely human endeavor. A sacramental marriage has God in the midst of it. It is a path to heaven, a way of achieving holiness in the world, a vocation of service to which we are called by God. By entering into a sacramental marriage, we don't just risk everything we have for the sake of another human being -- we risk everything for God. And, when all is said and done, that's always a good bet.

Meditations of a Young Priest

My grandfather was a Methodist minister, so I have a soft spot in my heart for the priesthood. In a very real way, young priests are the hope of the future. They give us hope that as parents we can raise our children to serve a goal bigger than themselves. They give us hope that the Church, as a Mother, is doing something right by raising up enthusiastic and dedicated spiritual children. Following is a guest post from a young priest meditating on the well-known parable of the talents from the Gospel of Matthew (25:14-30).

There will come a point in all of our lives, where we are confronted with a challenge which we think is far beyond our abilities. Whether it’s our coach, our boss, our parents, our children – we are asked to do something which we can’t imagine we’ll ever succeed at doing. The first few times I had to speak publicly – I did anything I could to get out of it. In some ways we’re humble, recognizing we have our limits, or maybe we’re too afraid of embarrassing ourselves, but it’s easy to refuse a challenge which seems beyond us. This challenge often lifts us to a higher level though – if we succeed we are amazed at how we can impress even ourselves. And if we fail, we can still be impressed by how well we did, despite our falling short.

Today, we hear the words of the master “You wicked, lazy servant,” and perhaps we think he’s being a bit harsh. Here’s a servant, pretty much a household slave, being given one talent – which at that time was the equivalent of maybe 15 years wages. So imagine being as unskilled in investments as someone like me, and being handed all that money. Maybe it’s understandable that he was afraid to do anything with it. Maybe there’s an honesty in admitting he wasn’t up for the challenge. But what does the master say – “Should you not then have put my money in the bank so that I could have got it back with interest on my return?” The money could have made a profit itself, not requiring him to take a risk by trusting his abilities.

Now I don’t think our Lord is worried about us turning a profit on our investments. We too, however, have been given a great gift like the servant, the value of which is far beyond anything we have or can ever have. We have been entrusted with Jesus Christ. God gave His Son to die for us, to live in each of us, that we may share in his resurrection. We don’t deserve it, and it’s certainly beyond anything on this earth in value, and we’re told to make good use of it. So what do we do?

Well, if we’re being honest, our instinct is most likely to bury it in the same way. Because it is so intimidating, it is a task which seems impossible. We are asked to be like Christ – to empty ourselves of all selfishness, to control all of our desires perfectly, to live only for others and never for ourselves. Thank you Lord for thinking so highly of me, but I think this challenge is a bit too much. And this is very much what the world will tell you. Being a Christian is too difficult, it denies our human nature, it makes us give up what we want and will only make us frustrated and miserable. The culture we live in will tell us to settle for mediocrity – everybody does this sin, everybody does that sin, to expect to do better is unrealistic. God loves us even though we’re imperfect, so we’ll just leave it at that. But to quote G.K. Chesterton, and if you haven’t picked up on this yet he’s a personal favorite – “The Christian ideal has not been tried and found wanting, it has been found difficult, and left untried.”

The world will point at the young pregnant woman and tell her it’s too difficult to have a child, she has to give up too much, it will crush her future hopes. The world will tell the young unmarried couple to surrender to their carnal desires and give up on trying for chastity. The world will tell all of us to take the easy way, to settle for a life lived for money and pleasure and comfort, because that’s the best we can do. The world has given up on the Christian ideal, it has given up on the fairytale ending – because it believes it’s unrealistic to expect people to live what the Church teaches, it is unrealistic that we could all be saints.

But the gift we have been given, it accrues interest, more interest than we could ever use. Our faith, the life of Jesus Christ in us, is the most powerful force in the world, it can make us saints! But we must let it, we can’t bury it. We can’t abandon hope of ever succeeding, because that is not humility, it is doubt of God’s power. While the world will seek to keep us down, our faith tells us – we are more than that!

Our faith tells the young mother that she holds in her womb a human life, and bringing that life into the world will be a heroic act of love which she is capable of and will bring her endless joy. Our faith tells the young girl she can meet her gallant prince, and the young man that he can find his pure princess, that sexuality is sacred and something which will bring the greatest joy when shared in the intimacy of a marriage. And our faith tells all of us, that we can live for more than ourselves and our comfort, that we can be different, that we can break the mold we’ve been given and prove to the world that there is something more. The world has rejected these ideals, even though they will make us far happier, because they require us to surrender to God. To allow Him to guide our lives, and move us in ways we are not prepared to move and which may make us uncomfortable.

Our faith tells us, that we can be heroes, if only we believe God can do it.

As we approach the altar today, we will receive that great gift, that talent which has a value beyond measure, our Lord’s Body Blood Soul and Divinity in the most Holy Eucharist. Let’s not bury him and settle back into our spiritual ruts. Let’s let him transform us, make us into heroes. Let’s reevaluate our lives – how much of my time and talents do I bury in the internet and TV and gadgets, rather than dedicating myself to prayer and learning about my faith and serving others. In what ways have I looked over a sin as something unavoidable, as something which is impossible to overcome – rather than seek every day to root it out. We should wake up every morning on fire, burning with the desire to be heroic, to be a saint – not because we’re great, because our God is great and he’s the one who’s doing the work. Let us prove to the world that there is something more to live for - that life is beautiful and epic when our lives are defined by that drama of our faith.



Photograph By Matthias Ulrich. The original uploader was Matteo3000 at German Wikipedia (selber fotografiert) [CC BY-SA 2.0 de], via Wikimedia Commons

Best Catholic Books I Read in 2014

Here’s my list of best Catholic books I read and reviewed in 2014 — best kids' books, love stories, lives of the saints, and even mysteries. There should be something here for everyone. Enjoy!

Best Kids' Books

Children of Terror, by Inge Auerbacher and Bozenna Gilbride.  Children of Terror is an autobiographical account of two survivors of the Nazi death camps -- Inge, a German Jew, and Bozenna, a Polish Catholic. The nearly unimaginable details of their young lives present a gripping portrait of the horrors of World War II. For middle school and up because of the subject matter. Click here for my review and link to buy.

Saint Nicholas and the Mouse of Myra, by Jay Stoeckl.  This fun and appealing graphic novel retells the story of every kid's favorite saint.  The fictional Mouse of Myra is a real dramatic foil for St. Nicholas, who quietly converts this pagan and skeptical mouse to Christianity. Written at a third- to fifth-grade level but enjoyable for all ages. Click here for my review and link to buy.

Mission Libertad, by Lizette M. Lantigua.  Threats to religious liberty are nearer to us than most young people imagine, and the story of Castro's Cuba brings that lesson home in a powerful way. Born of Cuban exiles, journalist Liz Lantigua has written an eye-opening fictionalized account of a Catholic family escaping Cuba on a small raft with a mission to achieve freedom in the United States. For teens. Click here for my review and link to buy.

Best Love Stories

Chastity Is For Lovers: Single, Happy, and (Still) a Virgin, by Arleen Spenceley. Love is not about what you get (or what you get to do between the sheets). Love is about what you give and how you give it. The culture tells us that love means having sex, but sex doesn't mean having babies. In this excellent rebuttal of current cultural mores, Arleen Spenceley explains that single people love in lots of ways that don't include sex, and married people (in most cases) share love through having sex and having babies. But both single and married people can achieve happiness through loving and being loved. Click here for my review and link to buy.

Tobit's Dog, by Michael N. Richard. The Biblical story of Tobit's marriage to Sarah, whose previous seven husbands had been slain by demons, has been cleverly reimagined in this new novel set in the backwoods of Depression-era North Carolina. Tobit's Dog combines elements of a young man's journey into adulthood, a love story, and a murder mystery. Click here for my review and link to buy.

The Lion's Heart, by Dena Hunt.  Almost certainly the first of its kind, this gay Catholic romance novel was published by Full Quiver Publishing, a small Canadian company dedicated to promoting St. Pope John Paul II’s Theology of the Body mainly through the medium of fiction. The book is part of a growing effort of faithful Catholics to reach out to the gay community. The Lion’s Heart acknowledges that homosexual love feels like true love to those experiencing it. But true love requires what’s best for the beloved, and in the case of homosexual love, as dramatically depicted in the story of Paul and Max, what’s best for the beloved is to walk away. Click here for my review and link to buy.

Best Stories of Saints and Graces

Seven Saints for Seven Virtues, by Jean Heimann. Seven Saints for Seven Virtues particularly recommends St. Augustine as a role model for cohabiting couples who feel that marriage is unnecessary, pointless, or even constricting. St. Augustine cohabited with his mistress for 15 years, never marrying her and never attaining true happiness. Then he learned that true love is unsatisfied by anything less than a total and definitive self-surrender either to God in celibacy or to each other in Holy Matrimony. The book's other chapters similarly highlight one saint whose example can teach us one virtue. Seven Saints and Seven Virtues provides an excellent road map to the quest for virtue. Click here for my review and link to buy.

American Saint: The Life of Elizabeth Seton, by Joan Barthel. Calling itself "the definitive biography of Elizabeth Seton," American Saint, by New York Times best-selling author Joan Barthel, is the first full-length biography of St. Elizabeth Seton to be written in nearly fifty years. Drawing heavily from the saint's own collected writings, American Saint traces Elizabeth's life from her childhood as a wealthy Episcopalian to her death as an impoverished Catholic who founded the first order of American nuns and became the first American-born canonized saint. Click here for my review and link to buy.

The Grace of Yes: Eight Virtues for Generous Living, by Lisa Hendey. Even healers need to be healed. Even teachers need to learn more. And even those who advise perfection aren't perfect. If we're willing to admit that, then we have the grace of integrity, explains Lisa Hendey in her fourth book The Grace of Yes. Integrity is one of the many hidden graces that Lisa introduces us to in The Grace of Yes. Others include creativity, vulnerability, and even the strength to say no to a good that we are not called to do. Throughout the book, Lisa's encouraging voice reassures and inspires us to dig deeper, reach farther, and keep fighting the good fight. Click here for my review and link to buy.

Best Mystery Novels

The Truth and Nothing but Lies, by Chéri Vausé. This issue-driven mystery novel about the bombing of an empty abortion clinic falls within the tradition of pro-life novels such as Elizabeth Schmeidler's The Good Sinner, which centered around the murder of an abortionist. Considering how much the issue of abortion divides our country, it's surprising that more authors don't use it to dramatic effect. The book does an excellent job of presenting arguments for both sides through the characters, and then letting the reader decide.  Click here for my review and link to buy.

The Night Shadow, by Chéri Vausé. This film noir style detective novel stars a female, Catholic version of famous fictional private investigator Sam Spade (remember Humphrey Bogart in The Maltese Falcon?).  She and her partner are hired to discover whether a young and talented ballerina was burned to death by arson or accident. The main characters' Catholicism is understated and primarily cultural, but it has the gritty realism of people trying to do their best with the sometimes lousy situations life has handed them. Click here for my review and link to buy.